how do i explain? that as much as i know i need to move on, its been so hard. these tears has not stop falling since last night when i knew. yes hun, i knew. it was right in front of eyes but i didnt pick it up. not until i read wat you wrote. and i put 2 and 2 together.

the hurt i tot was healing began to bleed again. and everything came back to square one. its not a blame. you could haf told me tho i know it isnt my place to know. but you knew. you knew how much you still mean to me. i knew i like you the first time i saw you. i knew i love you wen u told me to stay and not leave. i knew i want to spent the rest of my life wif you since valentines. when you wrote all those things.

i dunno how u culd stop loving sumone. i just culdnt do it hun. i spent the last 2 mths thinking that i am over it. and i still shed these tears for you. i spent the last few mths telling myself that i am not in love wif you and everyday it felt like i am lying to myself.

i am not trying to make this your problem. i am just baring wat i tink i shud haf bared in a longest time. you once asked if i could wait for you. even if the mouth said that i culdnt. you knew the heart will always wait for you. tho i am saying the truth wen i say 5 yrs is a tad bit too long. but it wuldnt haf made a difference coz i know that your the man i want to spent the rest of my life with.

but things changed since then. i dun tink that question mattered.
and i also know i nvr had the courage to ask you those questions for answers i needed to know. i would nvr be strong enough to hear that you dont love me again. i know wat u feel wen i left you at the airport. i am not being in denial nor am i naive. i know.

let me do this my way. it may take the longest time and prolly making the mistake of letting the next person go due to my heartache.

i love you. and i will always love you.
right now, i just need to learn to let it go and move on as i shud haf 4 mths ago.